Sunday, September 15, 2013

Tender Mercies Abound..

I think that I need to carry a little notebook around with me so that I can try and remember all of the amazing things that happen every day.  I am usually writing this in the wee hours of the night or morning and so my brain power is not always at its maximum and I forget a lot of things that have happened.  This past week I had several neat things happen to let me know that angels are sure watching over our family and helping us along in our journey.  Tender mercies if you will.

I can't remember if I wrote about Halea's english grade from last term.  In short she got a B- ,very unusual for her nearly straight A record.  If this B- stays on her transcript it would disqualify her for a large portion of her college scholarship that she has been working towards for three years.  The reason she got the B- really is because the teacher marked something late that was not late.  I went in with Halea and talked to the teacher a few weeks ago, which I have never done before.  I am a big believer in letting the kids work out their own problems at school, for the most part.  I went into the meeting, praying for the teacher to have her heart softened.  While we were meeting that was not exactly what we felt.  I asked her to consider Halea's grade and that I would contact her in two weeks.  On Tuesday I called and she did not answer, so I left a message inquiring about Halea's grade.  A little later that day the teacher called and left a message saying that she had taken care of the grade!  Prayer works.  She was pretty cold while we were there in her office.  I know that something miraculous happened.  I was so nervous that I was going to have to really pull out all of my gusto and meet with the principal.  So grateful that is not the case and that her grade is resolved.  I wasn't sure if I would have the energy to go through too many more confrontations.   This was a huge tender mercy.

The other morning I went out to our peach tree to check and see how they were coming.  In August Halea and I were talking and she told me that last year she had gone out and thinned the peaches (of course she had? what teenager thinks to thin the peach tree, especially when her mother didn't even know to ask her to do it!), but this year with all of the craziness in our spring, she just hadn't.  I was a little worried that our peaches were going to be really small and not a very good harvest.  I was also nervous because our branches are heavy laden with fruit and a few of them have been touching the ground!  When I went out the other morning and I saw all of the peaches and how beautiful they were and not many had fallen off of the tree despite all of the crazy wind and rain the past couple of days.  I started looking around at how many peaches there were and how big they were, I got a little teary.   A spiritual moment with my peaches.  Heavenly Father new that I was looking forward to the harvest of our peaches.  He also knew that we had been focused on other things that were way more important.  What a tender mercy.
We probably picked 6 or 7 of these bowls full! Peachapalooza:)

At the end of this week I needed to go up to a hospital in Salt Lake because one of our patients delivered up there.  I wanted to go and visit with them and offer support and do some hand molds and prints, etc.  I dropped Hilary off at my nieces which was really nice because she absolutely adores her and her husband so there was no crying or clinging like there has been the last few times I have had to leave her.  I got on the freeway and I was blasting my Hilary Weeks CD.  I have said it before how much I love this CD.  I am pretty sure that she may have written it for me.  Every song just speaks to me.  There are some songs that help me feel my deep sadness and there are some that help me feel my triumph over the sadness.  Before this day I would have highly recommended it to everyone.  I was getting off of the freeway, and I was so into the music, I am sure I was singing loud and proud when out of the corner of my eye I noticed a motorcycle and then red and blue flashing lights!  Uh oh I think that's for me, was my first thought.  My second thought was my license is expired.  Wow.  Usually in my past (very vast) experience with tickets I get really upset and nervous and for some reason I felt super calm.  There was nothing I could do about it and I felt OK.  As the officer came to my door he asked me if I was late for something.  I told him "No not really, I was just listening to my music".  He smiled, probably because he could hear that it was church music!  Then he asked if this was my van?  I laughed and said yes.  Did he think that I had stolen this beauty?  Or maybe he thought that I was a new driver for UTA?  Then he showed me the reading.  61 in a 40!  I said "wow this van can really move".  He asked for my license and as I handed it to him I told him "by the way that is expired".  I explained that I had sent off for my social security card and birth certificate but I haven't received them yet so I can't get my license renewed.  I haven't ever needed to show my actual social security card, ever.  All of a sudden this is a new requirement to renew your license!  He said he would just be a minute.  When he came back he handed me my copy of the ticket.  He said that he did not write me for a moving violation, just "not having a current license in my possession".   He said the violation would not affect my insurance and that the ticket should only be 35-40 dollars.  I was so relieved.  I might not even have to tell Lance about this one (don't worry, I still did).  I apologized for speeding and told him I would pay better attention to signs.  I have never had an officer let me out of a ticket, ever.  I have had my fair share.  What a nice officer and another tender mercy.  

Saturday morning my friend and a few of her family members were going on a long bike ride and asked if I wanted to come along.  I can't pass up a bike ride because the season is coming to an end soon and I have to get it all in while I can.  I tried to talk Lance into coming but apparently he only rides to commute to work, not for enjoyment.  Silly.  We started off at 7am because otherwise it is too dark.  We rode out to Saratoga by the Lake.   After we had ridden about 20+ miles we swung by our favorite breakfast place, Kneaders, and had some yummy foods, before we continued on our fun ride.

Yes that is an actual cupcake at the top.  Boston cream cupcake!  What in the heck.  Hey, we split it four ways, so it was only a 1/4 naughty.
We continued on and rode up to Bridal Veil Falls up Provo Canyon and then on to Vivian Park.
Here we are at Bridal Veil Falls.  In all we ended up riding just shy of 70 miles.  What a fun day.  The weather was beautiful, the ride was fun and the company was perfect.  I am so grateful for good friends that have been mindful to help me get out and do things.  I am sure they don't even realize how helpful it is for me.  I have been lucky that my friends have rallied around me and carried me through some really dark days.  Sometimes, I am sure, they haven't even realized that they have called or helped right when I needed it.  Tender mercies.

I have been pondering how our emotional wounds are much like physical wounds.  When you have a physical wound your first instinct is to curl up around it and hold it and put pressure on it.  In reality what you have to do is open it up and straighten it, clean it, stitch it, apply medicines.  All of this requires some amount of letting go, exposing and usually pain.  Our emotional wounds are so similar.  My first instinct has been to just curl up and close my eyes until this is all over.  I know that my heart will never heal if that is what I do.  The pain is sometimes unbearable.  I can't even explain how much it hurts if I think too hard about it.  The other day I was finishing my run and I was coming to the top of our neighborhood.  I decided to think about every person and what they are experiencing in their lives as I passed their home.  It was overwhelming.  There were people with wayward kids, people that battle chronic disease, people that are dying, people that are lonely, the list goes on and on.  Everyone has their battles that they are fighting.  Everyone is scared of the unknown that they are facing.  We all have the same refuge that we can find through the storm.  That is our Savior and our Heavenly Father and the Holy Ghost (the forgotten member sometimes).  I was relating that first big seizure event to a friend of mine and it was such a reminder of how much Heavenly Father has blessed me.  That first day was the worst day of my life and yet there were so many undeniable blessings.  It is such a confirmation to me that we are not alone and that we are all loved.  We just need to try and recognize all of our tender mercies.  It doesn't take away all of the sting of hard trials.  My heart may never be completely healed until I get to see Trevin and Tatum again.  But knowing that the things that I believe are true, is comfort enough until that day.  I will hold on to that knowledge and protect it and share it until the day that I die.  I cannot and will never deny that angels abide in our lives and that their is a plan for me and my family and that I have Heavenly parents that love me and a Savior that died for me and has felt all that I feel.  I know that beyond a shadow of a doubt.  What a tender mercy in my life.

1 comment:

  1. So true....everyone is going through something.... you just never know. Oh, and I totally wouldn't have split that cupcake....and I wouldn't have even felt guilty. LOL Holy cow...70 miles? I have a hard time DRIVING 70 miles....behind a car's engine...expending no rock!